memoirs of a dude

Joining the MapleSEA Contest

2007-07-06T23:37:00.001+08:00

hi peeps.. been some time. well recently ive been back to maple, and ive been in bad need of @cash, so i vowed to join the next contest maple organises, as they usually give away @cash as prizes. however the new contest was to design a monster for the new Singapore map, and the prizes were pretty boring, with not a single bit of @cash concerned. but a vow is a vow and i got to work. i thought pretty hard of what would be original, as i saw most of the competition and they were quite creative. so i thought of ah meng.... this is what i created:

u will have to click on it to view it clearly. sorry about that. anyway i havent used the forums so i had to create an account and they wouldnt activate my account till 2 working days later. dammit! id have to wait.. anyway wish me luck! i will leave you with some references. Cheers!

Contest details: http://www.maplesea.com/intro/events/game_events20070704.aspx

Forum page for contest submissions: http://forums.playpark.net/showthread.php?t=70193

A Strange Coincidence? Or Some Conspiracy?

2007-05-16T17:35:00.000+08:00

hihi.. dunno y im blogging so often these days.. feel so gay.. i think maybe its cos theres quite a lot to talk about.. lets get started anyway..

every heard that the shape of Singapore was similar to the shape of a green crab? and that LKY came up with the ingenious idea of placing an octagon in every $1 coin for good feng shui for Singapore? well it may be true, or it may not be true. but first bear in mind that recently there has this been this issue of Singapore experiencing low birth rates.. so.. well... we stumbled upon this...

LOLOLLOL!!!!!!! damn funny.. i laughed my ass off when i saw this.. so this is what the architects and engineers were thinking of when they built the Esplanade! trying to increase Singapore's fertility and birth rate huh? lolll... anyway if u dont understand what i mean go jump off a cliff or sth. so anyway if any tourists or strangers ask u the significance of the Esplanade or the Obelisk, u now know the answer muahhaha!!

oh yeah my friends and i were wondering.. Suntec City is nearby, and everyone knows that Suntec City was built in the shape of a semi-opened hand.. what could be next? how would the new Integrated Resort look like in order to complement the "Esplanade and Obelisk"? use your imagination ;) ill cya next time! hehe..

Beware of... The Cookie Monster!!

2007-05-13T20:06:00.000+08:00

ever wondered why some parents don't let their kids watch Sesame Street? do u noe wat a 'cookie' can actually refer to? and the from the sick minds of the creators of sesame street spawned...

THE COOKIE MONSTER!

do not be fooled my his amicable appearance. this fiend is very dangerous, and often preys on innocent preschoolers who believe he is just a fluffy toy. just look at those psychotic eyes.. filled with who-knows-wat-sick-thoughts. his mind is so warped his pupils cannot focus on a single object, he cant speak properly and goes beserk when he sees none other than.... cookies! when he is feasting he often makes demented sounds like 'UMYUMYUMYUMYUMUM!!' scientists believe that this is some form of primitive noise it makes when he reaches an orgasm.

yes folks be scared.. be very scared.. u are never safe with the cookie monster around. this is an artists impression of what the cookie monster would look like when in a rampage.. warning: this can be quite disturbing..

it sickens me to even think of what this creature is capable of.

True Style Never Shouts

2007-05-04T20:56:00.000+08:00

thats the slogan for the new Nokia 6300, which by the way is also sitting in my pocket muahahahha!!

YEESSS i finally got my new Nokia 6300!! since this blog is for whining ill put it to good use :)

i was supposed to get my phone one the 2nd of may, however when my mom went to get it, she found out that my plan hadn't expired, as she renewed it the previous time. as i waited a long time for this day, i was really really disappointed. however she agreed to break the plan and get me the phone by paying the heart-wrenching penalty of $100. (damn u singtel, earn from others' misfortunes) anyway i was pretty thankful.

then the next day it arrived in the sleek blue box...

yes, mesmerising isn't it? the matt metal finish, slim sexy shape and the vivid 16mil colours screen. a true work of art. at first it didnt look very good on the net, so i went down to wheelock to have a better look at the phone. those phones they let people play around with really suck as they are very badly damaged from being manhandled by peoples' grimy paws. even the N95 there was damaged from rough handling... wat a fucking waste! anyway because the 6300 on display wasnt in very good condition, it turned me off all the more, but i still decided on getting it as i dont like twist, fold or sliding phones as they tend to be more fragile n bulky.

well its really good. at least in comparison to my trusty 6230. it has double zoom which lets me see every detail of the pictures in the phone. this will really help me with my drawings as i use my phone for reference. the camera isnt spectacular, with N95's imba 5megapixel camera.. holy shit man can make ur own amateur videos with that. but it still pwns my previous 6230's VGA cam LOL.

ah well im definitely typing too much.. and no one likes a wordy blog.. so ill stop here.. ill try to update with more interesting things lolx.. ciao..

Songs

2007-05-01T20:04:00.000+08:00

juz ignore this post lolx.. its more for my reference.. sorry..

in order of appearance:
1. Guns 'N' Roses - Sweet Child O Mine (incomplete)
2. Dishwalla - Angels & Devils
3. Sum 41 - Pieces
4. SR-71 - Right Now
5. 3 Doors Down - Kryptonite
6. Blur - Song 2
7. Bon Jovi - Livin' On A Prayer

upcoming..

Some VERY good quotes from movies...

2007-03-31T18:37:00.001+08:00

hey long time no see! well ive watched a few movies recently and i got some good laughs.. the title kind of speaks for itself, and i really like witty jokes that come up at the right time.. so.. lets cut to the chase! i will be updating this list so be sure to check back to this post once in awhile!!

1. The world was going to get flooded due to the melting of the ice..

Sid: "maybe we can rapidly evolve into water creatures."
Diego: "thats real genius Sid"
Sid: "call me SQUID"

LOOLOOOOOLLL.. kudos to the producers of...
-Ice Age 2: The Meltdown!

2. After gulping down some champagne....

Benjamin: "mm! who wants Chinese takeout? i know a great place!"
Wayne: "i'll have the cream of sum yung gai"

WAHAHAHAH... nice one..
-Wayne's World

3. Detective Spooner was in Lawrence Robertson's office regarding his suspicion of the robots..

Lawrence Robertson: "Just imagine the mass recalls, all because of irrational paranoia and predjudice."
Detective Spooner: *sneezes loudly* "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit."

LOOOLL nice comeback!
- I, robot

4. Wallace had just used his BV 6000 to suck up all the bunnies, and victor's toupee as well, and he was trying to get it back..

Victor: "I want..tou.. toupee(to pay) please!"
Wallace: "Oh grand! Er.. we take cheque or cash."
Victor: "Toupee u idiot.. my hair is in your machine!"
Wallace: " Oh no.. its only rabbits in there.. the 'hare' i think you'll find is a much larger mammal.."

haha nice wordplay..
- Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of The Were-Rabbit

P.S. i sure hope u catch the jokes.. if i explain the meanings it wouldnt be too funny anymore.. cheers :D

happy belated bday to me!!

2007-01-26T17:46:00.000+08:00

FINALLY AN UPDATE OMG!

my bday was on the 24th but i didnt have time to update till now lols. anyway i got some cash and some prezzies from my family, but when i went to sch i got wat ive always wanted: my very own lava lamp!

actually i wanted a lava lamp for my very own house when i grow up. ive always wanted my own chillout room/lounge with a sweet flat screen tv, soft bean bags, a cool lava lamp and a great stereo system. hopefully i will be able to get that in the future!

anyway with my current crappy room my new lava lamp does little to beautify it. although it is still really fun to watch. here it is in orgasm mode:

sweeeetttttttt........

o well if i do get my dream room ill surely invite all my frens to hang out there.

today is also my long time frens bday. happy bday zhi!

my luck was also pretty good today. we play lots of blackjack during free time, and usually i lose lots of money wahaha cos i play mainly for the fun of it. but today i was banker and i won quite alot. kewl! i had lots of this:

muahahhaa... ah well besides all this life has been mainly chatting on msn, goin to sch n studying.. so boring ): anyway i dun have anything else to say lols.. so cya next time!

Robots and Retards

2006-10-08T02:12:00.000+08:00

haiz posting about this matter will just make me angrier and angrier. but what choice do i have? its the only way people can get to know why im angry about this. oh well, here we go then..

there have always been these weird people starting to add me on msn ever since that day. i forgot what day it was but it sure sucked. these people had retarded msn nicknames and gay email addresses like dummie_smartie225@... and sexii_tryhard@... when i saw these people adding me i knew: this cant be good.

anyway i had to find out whats going on. so i asked them who the hell they were. some of them were from canada, some from australia. one thing that was in common was they all thought i was ricky (hes a fucking bastard i'll tell u why in a while). i was pretty confused as these people obviously didnt know each other n yet all of them thought i was the same person. so i asked them where they got my email from. then they gave me some shitty website that was linked to msn robots or something like that. ok i did a little research and heres wat these msn messenger 'robots' really are:

theyre kind of like bots for msn messenger (duh!). its like a program which u can talk to and it replies to your questions or wadeva u say. i mean, wat kind of loser needs this kind of thing? doesnt this really defeat the whole purpose of a MESSENGER? a messenger sends messages from someone to another, not letting some geek talk and get turned on by some AI -.- seriously these ang moh dweebs gotta get some friends and a life, instead of talking to themselves.

anyway i asked them more specifically where they got my email from, then they said this faggot ricky posted his name and my email as his in the forum. so people with no life started adding me thinking im some fucking robot who will reply to their lame questions.

i tried looking for the post, but the forum was filled with people saying things like 'i love msnbots! now i have someone i can always talk to!!' and 'these robots are my best friends. i dont know what id do without them!!' OMG i didnt know this kind of scum people really existed! and to think these soulless people wanted to add me! OMGGGGG!!! i felt really insulted. once again fuck u ricky.

oh well. i didnt really solve the problem and i think there will still be more losers adding me in the future. hais. someone help me. anyway if i find out who this fag ricky is, i got half a mind to cut out his intestines n strangle him with them >:( now i got myself pissed off for nothing..

OMG!! IT LIVES!!!

2006-10-01T21:54:00.000+08:00

yes it does. Muahahahhah.. i have revived my dead blog. it has been dead pretty long, because so has the blogger. by the way: employer has employees, interviewer has interviewees, so are you my blogee? lolx.. sounds like some kind of laxative. anyway now that my promos are over, i can finally sit back n chill. at least till chinese A levels.

whoa theres nothing to write.. im sitting here typing because my ever so reasonable mother has once again banned me from playing com every weekend. seriously this sucks. i think the army has a better lifestyle. thats why im looking forward to army so much wahaha.. let me list down the reasons:

Ships' Ten Commandments(actually Reasons but Commandments has a very nice effect :P) For Looking Forward To Army XD

1. Thou can stay away from home for 3 months. (juz recently i'd do anything for this)
2. Thou can train thou's body. (yes its time to disco XD. pass the oil please)
3. Thou will be paid mesos for it. (this part rocks. esp when im so low on it)
4. Thou can take a 2 year break from school. (DAMN this is one of the best reasons)
5. Thou can do whatever thou likes. (who knows if things go the right way, i MAY get drums :D)
6. er..

well fine actually i can only think of 5 but theres really more haha. ok this post sucks like shit. im so sorry, my legions of fans. nothing interesting has happened recently. ill try to get into trouble more often ok :P dont worry when i learn more about blogging this place is gonna be da bomb ya? hehe.

Domokun Domination!

2006-08-22T21:04:00.000+08:00

it all started when i saw one of bryan's friendster pictures. it was a picture of domokun scolding his friend,'STFU n00b!!' LOL!!!! his actions and the way the picture was taken was extremely hilarious!!! here it is:

since then i have grown a liking for domokun, and i started seeing him in msn messenger emoticons, and other people's display pictures. his creation also led to many spoofs because of his very distinguishable menacing grin and his oblong physique. haha... domokun rocks.. here are some nice spoofs:

LOL!! he rocks too much. anyway domokun is a strange, fuzzy monster-like creature with black beady eyes and he hatched from an egg! he also lives with a wise old rabbit, Usajii, who wears specs, in an underground cave. his favourite food is beef and potatoes HAHA! he also farts when nervous or in a bad mood LOL!! he also strongly dislikes apples due to an unexplained mystery in his DNA. WAHAHA! as you can see from the picture with the marching domokuns, he clearly hates cats. dont ask me why XD

hehe. i also went to plaza singapura's ACTION CITY to look for some of his merchandise. all i found is a box with his face on it. when i asked the useless employees working there if they had any more merchandise, they just conveniently shrugged and said 'i dont know'. so much for top notch service in singapore -.- this is the kind of shit that brings companies' sales crashing down. anyway i gotta do some maths. ROCK ON DOMOKUN!

SUCKY chinese lesson...

2006-08-11T18:00:00.000+08:00

yay i finally found out how to upload images.. turns out you just have to click a little button in the page where you create a post -.- blogger is pretty user friendly lol.. anyway here i go..

omg lessons in school are so damn boring.. we spend the whole day sitting in class learning about concepts and techniques which we probably will not use unless we aspire to become the next Einstein.. sometimes i wonder if my ass will grow roots cos of too much sitting down..

anyway it was just another boring day at school. and quite often we have 2 straight hours of chinese, which TOTALLY SUCKS cos the teacher is probably some demon spawned from hell and sent to destroy innocent, happy lives such as ours, and IT feeds on our hopes and dreams, running us down like CHRIS sitting on a hapless bug.

anyway it was so fucking boring. and i was sitting at george's table. since he had already mutilated his table with liquid paper, i decided 'why not add more?'. so i took his bottle of liquid paper and dripped a drop onto the vandalised table, and waited for it to dry. after it dried, i added another drop and waited for it to dry, so on and so forth. and this was the masterpiece that formed after two hours of skill :) , perseverence, patience and hiding it from the malevolent bitch:

LOL rocks too much.. take that michealangelo and da vinci! THIS is art. art is created when u are making it during a boring lesson which would otherwise waste your life away. anyway i kept on building the tower.. and it mounted so high! i measured it and it came up to about 6cm!! heres some proof, but in this picture it is only 5cm tall :(

later on george broke it off and threw it away.. i guess a fag like him wouldnt understand true art. thinking of that chinese teacher juz makes me so pissed off. now i know why people invented nuclear bombs, bazookas, C4 and grenades. its to blow creatures like her sky high. thats a nice thought. anyway i shouldnt waste my time blogging about worthless crap. it may result in blogger getting a virus or something. i still gotta learn how to link to other friends.. until next time!

FILL my little world....

2006-07-31T20:42:00.000+08:00

i just watched X Japan's rusty nail last live. it turns me on. something in my life is missing. waiting for ns. so MAYBE i can get myself a set of trashers. please fill my emptiness. i need a long rest.

UPGRADED BLOG!! (now with tagboard and counter)

2006-07-23T19:23:00.000+08:00

omg after tons n tons of research and no help from frens cos theyre too busy, i have finally managed to find out how to use a tagboard and a hit-counter. For the hit-counter, the values are really low because i got it from sitemeter and this is one of their FAQs:

What is the difference between a visit and a page view?

When you are browsing a site, every time you follow a link to a new web page, it is treated as a single page view. Site Meter defines a visit as a series of page views by one person with no more than 30 minutes in between page views. If you click on a link to another site, and then come back to your site within 30 minutes, you are still on the same visit and Site Meter won't increment the counter. But Site Meter will increment the number of page views recorded for your current visit.

So therefore the value of my counter is pretty low.. who cares anyway i dont strive for this blog to be a super popular one. Anyway my next task is linking to my friends and getting a nice skin for this blog. Till the next improvement!

a FAT story of a FATTER person part II (its so FAT u gotta split it up XD)

2006-06-25T11:44:00.000+08:00

sorry for the abrupt end. haiz i think my mom controls me too much. sometimes it gets really irritating cos she keeps cursing me n running me down. its really hard to tolerate. anyway lets continue with the story.

the first day, we went out to sea to practise some of the one star skills such as capsizing. when some of us forgot a few minor things because we havent been kayaking for a few weeks, he blasted out at us, calling us 'kuku bird' and 'idiot'. wat the fuck? when i heard it i immediately, instantly lost every single ounce of respect for that fat shit. we had to split up into two groups later and sadly i was in CB's group. sucks.

at the end of the day we went to shower. all of us showered with our pants on n we were just joking around with each other, and then suddenly fatass CB took off his pants! shit it was so damn disgusting! but good thing i didnt see anything. maybe it was too small to see but i didnt want to risk getting blind so i didnt look. after what seemed like eternity he finally got his pants on, then he said to us,"there are two kinds of winkies, the show-er and the grow-er. show-ers are the same size in action and non-action time while grow-ers are small in non-action time and big in action time." why the flying fuck is he telling us this shit? we already have one each and we dont need some fat cunt to tell us about them. anyway no one gave a damn wat he said. realising he was ignored despite his extremely massive body mass, he slithered off.

twice they made us kayak in this big smelly drain behind the sports club. it was really gross because the water from the sea was retained in the drain, and couldnt be washed out due to the nature of the longkang. imagine all the spit, urine, dead fish and all that shit stuck in the same puddle of water, decomposing... yuck. the last day when we wet there i even saw a can of BYGON floating in the water!!! wat the fuk!!!!! if u dunno wat bygon is, its pesticide used to instantly MURDER roaches n other bugs. when i was kayaking there, the fat shit made us capsize in the rancid water. damn him. i got this slimy, oily, sticky yellowish substance on my spray cover. i picked out a bit of it for examination and when i smelled it, POOH! it stank so much! i hate u CB.

the last day when we were taking our spray covers, i checked if there was any of that shit on mine, then my fren was standing next to me and asked wtf i was doing, then i told him about the shit which i was so fortunate to find on my spray cover. he laughed at me as usual. then he suggested that it was semen, so i said,"whoa that yellowish shit was so damn disgusting. must have been chris' semen when he was looking at the other coach n pccing in the water" we all laughed out really loud. then i thought, "where is that CB anyway?" and guess wat? when i turned around there he was, pissed off that i found out about his secret and standing there staring at me. i couldnt tell how his eyes looked like because they were hiding behind his OMGWTF so cooooooollll terminator shades. it was so damn hilarious then. everyone was laughing but i knew there goes my cert T_T

later on in the drain where CB felt comfortable, he told us that he scolded us because he expects a lot from us and its his responsibility blah blah.. just give us the cert u fat turd!! then he said he'll zip up his mouth since we didnt like what he said. finally something good!! we relished the few minutes without his annoying voice, but soon after he starting blurting out at people. "oi u kuku bird! oi u idiot! hold ur paddle properly!!" so much for zipping up ur big mouth, i guess no zip is durable enough to keep ur trap shut n keep all that crap in it. hes such a mofo aint he?

he later on said that he wanted to fail a few of us. namely ME. he gave excuses like he assessed not only skill but ATTITUDE. with his fat fucked up attitude i wonder how he passed his PSLE. anyway he's juz angry with me cos i was the only one hu found out about his fat dirty secret and expressed how i felt about him.

then came the cert presentation. i was so happy it was the female coach hu gave out the certs and shook our hand. i'd rather burn my cert then shake that fat claw of his. glad that we got what we came for, we blew that joint, happy not to see the fat blob again. later on when we had walked a distance from the club, we noticed something very, very annoying. that oversized tub of lard signed everyone's cert properly EXCEPT mine and 2 others!! fuck him!! hes so disgusting he can make onions cry!!

i am so pissed that he got the last laugh.. at least that's what he thinks >:) anyway thats the FAT story of that fat bastard. i hope now u noe why i hate him to his oily gut, and how i feel about him. i hope u enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed describing him.

a FAT story of a FATTER person

2006-06-25T00:09:00.000+08:00

hello once again.. my mom's asleep now n she'll juice me if she finds out im on the com. anyway ever since i changed my msn nick to praise chris(lets call him CB. it stands for Chris Boy ;) ) people have been asking me, "hey hu's this chris guy?" so instead of repeating the same old story over n over, i decided to write it here >:)

Anyway before i start i juz wanna say ill probably get into trouble for this, and ill prob spoil the ventures' reputation blah blah.. but im just posting this to tell people about CB and what i think of him.

Before i start i must warn that i may use words that some people may find offensive. i cant really help it because i find that i can express my feelings about CB with them and that i find those words are most suitable in the situation or sentence. i am not forcing u to read it but i know u will carry on :P

it all started after i finished my one star kayaking course and started my two star course. this was for NYAA and it was fun as i could spend time with my ctss frens and my one star coaches were pretty good. anyway i was looking forward to this two star course, and i walked into the club with high hopes and a hungry heart. then CB came along... this was the beginning of the end.

anyway i thought he would be ok at first cos he was plump n bubbly. but i soon realised that he was like that only cos his crush, the other coach, was there too. i'd better not say her name cos i have nth against her, and him having a crush on her is juz wat i perceived. im laughin while im typing this LOL. shit my mom woke up.. ill have to continue this another time.. stay tuned for part 2 XD

blog --- rejuvenated

2006-06-15T21:53:00.000+08:00

whoa havent updated this crappy blog for ages.. anyway so far i did kayaking n first aid course this holidays. kayaking was okay but the first aid course really sucked. in addition to its suckiness, i had to pay $50 for it!! thanks a lot jw. (btw im whining here cos this blog is for my whining) the holidays was crappy. didnt get to study much, which i really wanted to do. today whilst walking home i passed the house a stones throw away from mine, n i heard the kid there drumming away. damn the bass drum, the snare n the hi hat, fusing together to produce tt irresistable beat that juz makes u wanna headbang... i really miss it. HELP ME!!

ouch

2006-01-17T17:51:00.000+08:00

yesterday i was supposed to eat sakae sushi buffet with some of my new JC friends, but things cropped up and in the end they didnt want to go. in the end i went there to eat with woen cheng, a very obliging person. there, i ate myself sick. after that i couldnt walk n laughing was excruciating. my stomach was so full i thought i was going to explode. i think that is one of god's ways of punishing sinners. my sin for that day: gluttony

Orientation has ended..

2006-01-10T16:43:00.000+08:00

and so has the fun.. lessons will begin tommorrow(wednesday). though im glad that we're finally settled down and starting to study before we lose our momentum, i'll also miss quite a few people in my orientation group. i hope that the class i am posted to will have some of my friends. Its been a fun orientation! ill miss u guys..

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

2006-01-02T23:02:00.000+08:00

a new year, hopefully a better start for me. i've got school tommorrow and i have to go pioneer jc, which is at choa chu kang! the trip there from home takes about 1.5hrs by bus n 1 hr by train, so i'd better get to sleep already.

the beginning.. of a boring blog

2005-12-31T01:38:00.000+08:00

this is the first time im making a blog.. its probably juz to blindly follow what most people are doing nowadays.. anyway its pretty late now.. i'll try to learn more about blogging and improve on mine. instead of using a template provided by the website -.-!! i want to know how to add a visit counter for my blog, and how to put titles for posts, and how to add links, and how to add a tagboard.. anyone who is free enough please help (: oh yeah by the way.. i wanted to put my url as freehotdogs.blogspot but someone already used it!! so much for a unique nickname